Pairing: Michael Scofield/Alex Mahone
Summary: Set during the events of "Blow Out", an alternate take on the conversation Michael and Self had about Alex.
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A/N-Sorry if the lj cut prompt says "read more" two times. I had some trouble posting this because of a bad connection!.
"How well do you know Alex Mahone?" Self asked Michael.
Michael's mind immediately flashed to their time in Sona together. Days filled with the torture of a place that was as close to hell as you could get. Days spent trying to survive, trying to escape. He thought of the times Alex had helped him, had saved him.
Saved him from actual death the day of the fight in the courtyard. Killing the man who would have killed Michael.
Alex had been ready to kill with him that day in Lechero's room, fashioning a weapon for Michael to use as well. Showing what to do, how to aim.
Keeping him safe.
Keeping him sane.
When Michael arranged the death of Sammy and his henchmen, Whistler thought it was an accident.
Mahone knew differently. He also knew how much it cost Michael to kill, and he offered his understanding. "It doesn't get any easier," he'd said. No matter how many times you have to kill, it never gets any easier. If anyone understood that, it was Alex.
Michael also thought of the nights that Alex would listen to him while he tried not to panic; being the voice of reason and logic and something comforting which Michael couldn't quite define. Michael remembered the way Alex would look at him and somehow just quiet his mind. The way his voice would get soft when he was trying to calm him.
He thought of the ways Alex would try and make him laugh, just to break the tension.
He remembered the day Alex came in with the bottle of rum he'd confiscated from Lechero's stash. They'd gotten a little bit drunk, a lot silly, and Michael had felt the most relaxed he'd been in more than two years.
He remembered the way Alex would touch him-just a hand on his shoulder or his back, something to show him he wasn't alone. Something to ground him.
"I know Alex very well," was all he said.
Self looked at him strangely.
Michael sighed. He didn't really want to talk about this, but he knew he had to try and get Self to reconsider and get Alex out of jail.
"I know him well enough to know that he'd do anything to take down the company. They did kill his son, you know. That's enough motivation for anyone."
"Yeah, but once they run his fingerprints through the system they'll know who he is and want to send him back to prison. Maybe he'll talk then just to keep from going back. After all, he can't avenge his son if he's in prison."
"True. Maybe you should think of getting him out before that happens," Michael hoped he could reason with Self, but he could see it was a losing battle.
"Can't do it Michael. I can't explain why I need him without endangering the mission. Now, you may think Alex is a standup guy, and maybe he is. But what if he isn't?"
Michael looked at Self and frowned. He didn't like where this discussion was going.
Self looked flustered but said, "Look, just because I can't get him out doesn't mean that he can't be gotten to. He's not untouchable."
Michael gasped, "That's NOT an option!"
"I'm just saying, if it comes down to a choice between the mission and Alex, one person's life can't jeopardize what we're doing."
Michael grabbed Self by the lapels of his suit.
"Don't say another word," he spoke softly, but Self could hear the anger in his voice.
"Calm down, Michael. I'm just saying-"
"I know what you're saying. I'm telling you not to even finish the sentence."
"Is not going to say anything. He wouldn't."
"But how can you be so sure? What reason does he have to keep quiet?"
Michael closed his eyes and looked down. Self could see that he was also trembling.
When he looked up, his eyes held unshed tears.
"The reason is-" Michael's voice dropped so low Self couldn't hear the rest of the sentence.
"I said, the reason is that Alex wouldn't betray me."
Self scoffed at that. "Who are you to him?"
Michael wanted to take Self's head and bang it against one of the beams.
"I'm the person he's in love with," Michael said as softly as he could.
"You heard me. The reason Alex wouldn't say anything, even if he goes to prison, even if they offer him a deal is that he'd rather die than betray me. He loves me."
"But-" Self was at a loss for words, for which Michael was extremely grateful.
"There's nothing more you need to know, so don't even ask."
"Do you-what about Sara?" The loss for words didn't last long, Michael thought, ruefully. Self couldn't help himself,
"It doesn't concern you. Now, you have your reason. Leave it alone."
"Is it enough, Michael?"
"Self, if you're talking about Alex Mahone and the way he feels for me, I'd say yes. For Alex, love is enough of a reason."
Self was not really surprised when Michael and the others ended up getting Alex out of the courthouse. He met them all back at the warehouse later and only halfheartedly berated them.
He looked across the room and saw Alex sitting next to Michael. Alex looked exhausted, as though he'd collapse if Michael weren't beside him.
He also looked incredibly relieved, as did Michael.
Michael put his hand on Alex's back, and Alex looked up and smiled at the touch.
Michael returned the smile.
Self noted that Michael and Alex had and an unspoken conversation simply through the looks they gave each other, and he had a moment of sadness. He used to have that type of closeness with another.
When his wife was alive.
After that, Self had no more qualms about what Alex and Michael would and wouldn't do for each other.
Michael might not have come out and said it, but he loves Alex just as much as Alex loves him.
Thinking about what he and his wife had, Self reflects that Michael is right.
Love is always enough of a reason.